I stared at the screen at the hotel, and put on the Food Network for background noise. \u00a0I had had the strangest run of what I would normally have considered luck, but after a night with the Questor and his family, understood was magic. \u00a0Several kinds of magic, really. \u00a0Good conversation, good food, all of that was a magic we folk who aren’t wizards share.\u00a0 Of course, the full set of green lights on the way back, the upgraded suite, the little perks, that was the kind of magic wizards could share and too often didn’t.\u00a0 I didn’t know what the karmic repercussions were, but the whole, “The aggravations are kept to a minimum,” feel of it seemed like a blessing more than a spell.<\/p>\n
I let the comforting buzz of Kitchen Stadium fill the air while I leaned back on the extra pillows I hadn’t needed to\u00a0ask for from room service. \u00a0I think the secret ingredient was spoo or targ heart or something. \u00a0I wasn’t really paying attention. \u00a0 I was thinking of Gideon and the monsters of Midian a la Clive Barker, honestly, having verified the contents of my hotel room’s desk drawer.\u00a0 (And checked for signs of bedbugs.\u00a0 Maggie got me into that way of thinking from her day job.\u00a0\u00a0 How I long sometimes for the bliss of ignorance.)<\/p>\n
The phone on the desk rang.<\/p>\n
I ignored it. \u00a0It simply couldn’t be for me.\u00a0 Someone who wanted to call me would have used my cellphone.\u00a0 I checked to make sure I hadn’t missed anything, idly, and then slid it back onto the table.<\/p>\n
It rang again.\u00a0 Someone was trying to get ahold of someone who had left this room, I decided. \u00a0 It was too late for any courtesy call.<\/p>\n
I let it ring a third time before curiosity got my tongue and killed the cat, or whatever the phrase is.<\/p>\n
“You never called me back,” Sylvie said.<\/p>\n
“You were supposed to be dead,” I said, feeling very nervous. \u00a0The Questor’s wife said I was safe from anything less than a Dragon. \u00a0I had believed her.\u00a0 I was sitting in my boxers half-watching delicious blue bantha ice cream\u00a0being prepared for the dessert portion of the competition.<\/p>\n
Of course, magic can’t fix the human things you messed up.<\/p>\n
“Oh, that. \u00a0Look, Maggie’s crazy.”<\/p>\n
That wasn’t a newsflash. \u00a0“I always thought so. \u00a0Have you seen the way she drives?”<\/p>\n
“No, she’s got some kind of rage-on for you. \u00a0I got some help from a… friend,” I knew without even asking that she meant an Other ally I wouldn’t approve of, “and tried to leave the coven. \u00a0I guess you got caught in the cross-fire.”<\/p>\n
“You had to fake your own death in order to leave? \u00a0I think I saw this cult in this movie, once. \u00a0 And you’re calling to apologize for me taking the fall?” \u00a0I was suspicious. \u00a0“How in the coldest Peruvian afterlives did you get my number?”<\/p>\n
“You’re, um, well, you’re bugged. \u00a0In a magical way. \u00a0We lost track of you earlier this evening, but the auguries found you again. \u00a0I was calling to try to tell you not to come back.”<\/p>\n
“What? \u00a0Since when am I in a spy novel?”<\/p>\n
“You let a witch help you in your convalescence. \u00a0Do you know how many bandages you left lying around? \u00a0At least you need to skip out of town for a while. \u00a0I’m serious. \u00a0After the blow-up between Maggie and Matana, and the whole Rohana thing, you’re on her hit list.”<\/p>\n
“You make it sound so literal,” I gulped. \u00a0“What Rohana thing?”<\/p>\n
“Um, your girlfriend, right? \u00a0Who lives with Joy, Maggie’s Second?”<\/p>\n
I remembered Joy only vaguely. \u00a0The Magster didn’t share well, and I got the impression (the few times I had actually listened to coven gossip) that she more had an understudy than any assistance.\u00a0 Joy wasn’t one of my favourites, and in fact, I remembered her as kind of mean.<\/p>\n
Wait.\u00a0\u00a0 Rohana lived with Joy?\u00a0 My girlfriend was some other girl’s girlfriend?\u00a0 I wanted to say it wasn’t an unpleasant thought, exactly, but I was kind of feeling weird about it.\u00a0 Really, except for its inevitability in adult video design, I had never really thought of anything like that happening to me.\u00a0\u00a0 On the other hand, Rohana didn’t seem the type to like mean girls.\u00a0 Not that I had any right to determine Rohana’s preferences.\u00a0 I liked that she seemed to like me, because that gave me license to like her.\u00a0 So there was probably a whole lot to Joy that I didn’t know, and I was just about to give her a pass on the mean thing I couldn’t remember, except that if she was also part of Mag’s coven she might be trying to kill me.\u00a0 What if she knew Rohana was cheating on her with a guy?\u00a0 My ticket to death city was about to be validated.<\/p>\n
“Uh, E?”<\/p>\n
Oh, I was involved in a conversation.\u00a0 “Sorry, I was thinking.”<\/p>\n
“Well, do it fast, and do it right,” she snapped. “Oh, I’m sorry,” she immediately apologized. \u00a0“You have no idea how stressed I am.\u00a0 There’s so much happening and I’m suddenly in the middle of it.\u00a0 I thought… I thought it would be different.”\u00a0 She sounded lonely and sad for a moment.<\/p>\n
“Of course they bite.\u00a0 What did you\u00a0expect them to do?\u00a0 Grant wishes?”\u00a0 I can’t have any of my chivalric tendencies manipulated like that.<\/p>\n
“What?”<\/p>\n
“It’s a reference to a movie. \u00a0Nevermind.” \u00a0I sighed. \u00a0“All my stuff is back at my place. \u00a0It would have to be pretty convincing to have me leave it behind.”<\/p>\n
“Fire? \u00a0Flood? \u00a0Blood?”<\/p>\n
“Ah, the terrible trio. \u00a0Now we are on to threats,” I said, and an anger took me. \u00a0“Look, I don’t care what kind of games you guys are playing. \u00a0Stay out of my way, and I’ll stay out of yours. \u00a0I’m not a witch, I’m not involved in your war, and I’ll handle the Shadow King my own way.”<\/p>\n
“Your own way,” she repeated. \u00a0“You can’t have it, you know.”<\/p>\n
“Yeah, it’s Shadow King, not Burger King.”<\/p>\n
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”<\/p>\n
“Ditto,” I said, and I hung up on her. \u00a0Who did she think she was, anyway?<\/p>\n
I stared at the phone for a moment as I realized that was indeed a good part of the question.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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